time_for_lynn: (thinking)
[personal profile] time_for_lynn
"Mom."

The woman, staring out into the distance, ignored the child in favor of her own dark thoughts.

"MOM."

She continued to ignore her, sighing, and thinking of how wonderful everyone's lives with be without her. The little girl knew some of what went through her Mother's mind, and tried once more to get her out of it.

"MOMMY!"

Janie turned at that, her face wearing a black expression which quickly turned to sadness.

"Mommy, you can't."

"Do your homework Lynn. I'll be inside shortly." With that, she turned away, and went back to staring.

"You're on a beach, 75 miles, two years and a universe away from home. You're not coming back, are you?" When Janie went silent, Lynn folded her arms "Whenever you get depressed you do this! I'm going to find a mental hospital and give you a straight jacket and you're going to be talking to walls for decades!"

"Strait" corrected Janie, absently, still looking out at the water "Walls don't leave you."

"STOP TALKING LIKE THAT!"

"I'll be home soon."

"You're not getting rid of me." Lynn said, sitting by the older woman. "I'm always here, cause you need me. Then I'm going to need you one day and you have to be there."

"Everyone leaves." she said, hollowly "I'm going to be alone in the end. I'll keep going and going and you won't."

"You can't get rid of me that easy, Mommy. I'm your gift remember? So you aren't ever alone."

"Lynn. I set things up so that you live with your stepdad. He loves you just like-"

"NO. You can send them away but you're not getting rid of me! I'm part of you Mommy more than Frankie or Grandma or Grandpa. I'm you and Daddy. We're always a family and nothing can change that! Even when we're not a family we are and just because you're sad doesn't change it. Sometimes things happen and no one knows why! But you don't leave family."

Janie looked stunned for a moment, noticing that the sky darkened and the waves were now rough. "You would have still had-"

"IN THE PAST" yelled the twelve year old as the sea began to boil. Hot winds whipped around and the older woman realized she needed to listen to her daughter and snap completely out of her daze. "IN LOS BLOODY FUCKING ANGELES! WHY? I don't want to be there. None of us do but you keep going back! WE LIVE IN A SHITHOLE apartment and I'm going to end up joining a gang if you don't stop slutting around"

"Slutting?" asked Janie, finally, not saying anything yet about the cursing. "That's not a word."

"Get your act together or you're never going to find a universe balance!"

"...You're twelve. That-"

"Mommy, are you really twenty-four?"

"Lynn."

"When you start being a Mommy, I'll start being a daughter but right now I'm a big cosmic bitch-slap."

With that, Lynn grabbed Janie's hand and hoped this would be the last time she'd have to do this.
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Lynn Kaelen

October 2016

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